At 4:30 AM

I am reading

"The Outlaw Bible of American Poetry"

and not understanding

some of the poems;

I'm reading them now,

because I can't sleep.

My son gave

me the book

and so, it's a treasure

I will always keep.

These are not

Robert Frost, Rod McKuen

or Sara Teasdale poems ( Sara's

my fave)

These are "beat" poets,

"outlaw poets" who rant and rave -

poets who lived near

Ashbury & The Haight

like Dylan, Bob

and Kerouac, Jack ~

their words full of

love, peace, rebellion

and sometimes hate -

The poems at

4:30 AM

are making more and more

sense, you know -

especially since the other day,

when the neurologist said:

"You need to prepare

yourself for chemo".

Christina 8/20/09

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

4:30 AM - II

People used to say

"Wow, you're 35?

You're 40?

You're 62?"

I used to be

flattered.

Now, I don't really

care.

I just want to

survive

and re-grow my hair.

Christina 8/20/09

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~