He came home from war and struggled with the thought of those that had died, some friends and some he barely knew. He wondered why them and not him?

Why he had made it home and they had not?

And he felt the guilt on the lonely nights he spent awake.

He had a partner that was killed, and he asked why him? Why not me?

It was his way - always wondering why he was the one left to carry on

and not the one that had died.

His life went on, and he watched his friends and loved ones die one after another, and he still wondered, why them? Why not me?

He would ask the Lord, and never got an answer.

It was as though there was a reason he was supposed to live and others die, but he never could find it.

He awakens at night and still wonders why not him and feels the guilt of those that deserved, in his opinion, to live much more than he.

Perhaps some day the answer would come, but till them he will have to live with the guilt and hope of finding the answer.

It was easy for him to forgive others, not easy for him to forgive himself.

 GB
TT