Things are pretty quiet in Calhoun County tonight John is down at the Sudsy Dudsy Laundromat and Bar (If there is not a better time to get bombed then when your doing your laundry we can't think of it) doing his weekly laundry and having a few cold ones while the laundry was getting done. Usually John does his laundry on a Monday night but this week things had been rather messy down at the Calhoun County Ambulance and feed company (we pick up and deliver at no extra charge) so he had to do a second load.

His problems started when the Calhoun County Ambulance and Feed Company (We pick up and deliver at no extra charge) got their brand new Ford ambulance to replace the 66 Chevy station wagon they had been using. It was about time some said when Elmer Mays was picked up off the road after having a minor accident and was shooken so bad by the time he arrived at the Calhoun County Hospital (all our doctors are broad certified) he had to get sixteen stitches in his head from the ride. Seems that every time they bottomed out Elmer was thrown to the floor as the rope strapping him onto the gurney was always coming loose.

Thing were going just great with the new ambulance until John got a call to pick up a patient on old rte. 46 while he had a load of Dr Jackson's famous liquid horse feed in the back in 55 gallon bags

In removing the horse feed from the ambulance John managed to tear one bag open on the side of the brand new never been used gurney with good straps to hold the sick patients in.

The liquid horse feed being the consistency of motor oil and twice as slick ran down the inside of the ambulance in a river as John was trying to get rid of it. Needless to say the slick river got to John and he flew out of the back of the ambulance as though he had been shot out of a cannon.

John not being one to shirk his duties as an ambulance driver managed to get most of the horse feed out of the ambulance, radio HQ's and get to the scene of the pickup on old rte. 46. Now the problem was getting the patient to stay on the gurney for any length of time due to the slickness of the horse feed. After several attempts John figured out just the right to pull the straps on the gurney so the patient would not slip off nor suffer from broken ribs

Everything worked well till they got to the hospital and John turned to back up to the loading dock. At that point the back door flew open and the patient flew out the back gurney and all and wound up in the maternity dept before he was stopped.

All turned out well though John managed to clean the gurney off and then to slop out the rest of the horse feed but his clothes sure smelled bad.

So now you know why John was down at the Sudsy Dudsy Laundromat and Bar on a Friday night.

Well there was that and Elma Lou but that can wait till another day

GB
TT